So Daniel, it has been nice knowing you, and having you in my class for last year certainly made life a little more interesting, and now it’s time to say goodbye. If you think this sounds like a bit like a funeral eulogy or something, it’s supposed to. I mean, can you blame me? He’s flying QANTAS on his way to Germany on FRIDAY THE 13TH! I mean seriously, there’s like maybe a 12% chance that his flight will go smoothly and not have something go wrong, so Daniel, your chances of survival is about 1 in 8. Good Luck. But before you get on board your fateful flight, here’s a small little message of final goodbye to you, in case you do survive, and in case you do come back next year…
So Daniel, For your flight over there, watch out for terrorists. In case you see anyone who looks like they’re about to hijack your plane, leave them be. If you don’t see anyone who looks like a potential terrorist, DO NOT BOARD THAT PLANE! Once you’re on board your nice big 747, remember to always be in brace position, as your plane may crash at any moment. Do not be alarmed if you’re plane breaks up in mid-air, that’s just a Qantas maintenance crew working on the aircraft. Once you crash into the lovely Singapore Changi Airport, take note of the A380’s on the tarmac there, and take plenty of photos for me, and if you can, try to hijack one for me, and bring it back here. Don’t worry if you can’t, I’ll just do it myself. Once aboard your flight to Paris, remember to be in brace position, and follow the same procedure as above. Once you’re on board your lovely Air France Airbus aircraft, take note of their new logo, and enjoy the flight. You’re in safe hands… For now…
Once you touch down in Germany, have fun. Bring us back souvenirs you selfish bastard! Don’t be like last time when you went to Europe for a month or so and came back with nothing for us! Come on, Thomas went to Thailand for two weeks and brought us back something! In fact that little black elephant is sitting on the top of my monitor right now. =D *waves to elephant*. Say Ahoy to your exchange family for me when you’re there. During your stay, always be prepared in-case you get kicked-out because you can be so damn stupid sometimes. In case that ever happens, don’t worry, unless you are not registered with Smartraveller.gov.au, otherwise you should just head over the boarder to Switzerland and fill in a form requesting euthanasia. Hmm… Actually, why don’t you do all of us here a favor and cross the boarder and fill in that form. Many of us will feel a lot better… Although before you do fill in the form, why not enjoy your time there by using their internet? There are many things you can do on the internet, and I’m sure you’ll enjoy their super-fast speeds so that you can view some of the things you’ve always wanted to view that you couldn’t view here in Australia.
Good luck at school over there. I’m sure you’ll be as successful over there as you are over here! Don’t cheat on Georgia!!!! =P Stay away from any suspicious looking people, and don’t talk to strangers. Look before you cross the road. Don’t forget to brush your teeth everyday. Make sure you pack clean underwear and change them regularly. Don’t forget to keep warm and stay healthy over there, as I hear you have very bad temperature tolerance, and that you don’t like steak. Hm, speaking of meat, tell us what horse meat tastes like when you get to try some… Watch out for falling ice, and anything else that may fly at you. Make sure you regularly keep up your blog, and post every now and then like I do, and make sure you regularly read my blog as well, because if you don’t, I will personally go over there, HUNT YOU DOWN AND MURDER YOU IN YOUR SLEEP!
Other than that, have a safe flight and enjoy your trip! =P
Bon Voyage Daniel! Hope to see you return safely for school next year!
